Peace and Chaos

I walked down the street this morning to go to the bagel store, two blocks away. I realized suddenly that I haven't felt so free in such a long time - free of physical burden and free of worry. It was a beautiful thing to be out of the house for just 10 minutes with my old self again. She is pretty awesome.

It is so nice to have both of the babies here, even with all the peeing on us and crying in tandem. Admittedly, SP and I did not get much sleep last night. We could have predicted that I guess, what with two month-old infants to change and feed at regular intervals. They let us sleep from 7:30AM - 10AM without interuption, though, which I thought was very considerate of them. We have never been so grateful for coffee, save for post-bad-hangovers perhaps.

The worst part of being up with them seemed to be that I felt I would fall over on them while nursing. I was so exhausted and just couldn't remain alert, the same thing I experienced last week with M alone. I need some stimulus. I think I need to try music or TV in order to pay attention to what I'm doing with them in the middle of the night. This is especially important while feeding J, since he must be reminded sometimes to keep breathing while he eats. Yes, I am aware that many people think breastfeeding is a tender bonding experience between mother and child that should not be tarnished by outside diversions, but come on. I'm feeding twins. Do you know how many feeds that is per day? Let's just say that there's plenty of time for all the tenderness.

SP went in to work this afternoon. Fortunately both the babies are napping. I am going to get a little shut-eye, too. I also had a little time to put some things away. That's it for now. Nothing at all exciting to report to the outside world. But then I guess if you've read this far, this must have held some interest for you.